Night Shift Mischief: I Never
by ImaSupernaturalCSI
Summary: Danny, Lindsay, Adam, Marty...a slow night at the lab...and the game of I Never
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: I don't own the characters of CSI:NY; they belong to CBS and Anthony Zuiker.**

**It's everyone's favorite CSIs on another boring night shift. Too bad things won't STAY boring for long...**

**I know I said chair races were in store for this next installment, but then someone suggested something WAY MORE FUN...**

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Danny Messer couldn't believe his luck. He wasn't sure how he kept getting put on the night shift, but he strongly suspected that it was because Mac Taylor had figured out that he and Lindsay Monroe may or may not have been goofing off on the job.

_Shoulda put the shelves in the refrigerator back_,he thought miserably.

At least Lindsay was here to stick it out with him.

Speak of the devil. "Hi, Lindsay. Ready for another night of absolute nothingness?"

She grinned and held up a pizza box. "Oh, it won't be so bad," she replied. "Marty and Adam are stuck here too."

"I wondered why Adam was still in Trace," Danny said, jerking a thumb to where the lab tech was patiently waiting on an AMS report. He had the headphones to an mp3 player in his ears and was jamming along with whatever was playing. It looked goofy, considering Danny could only see him, not hear him. It was like watching a bad audition of _American Idol_ with the sound turned off.

"So what's on tap for tonight?" Lindsay said. "We're pretty much all done with our other stuff. When Adam gets that trace report, we can't do anything about it until tomorrow, anyway."

"Maybe I'll take a ride down to Autopsy, see what's up," Danny said.

"Hold on, I'll come with you." Lindsay followed him with the pizza in hand.

"Pepperoni and sausage?" Danny asked.

She rolled her eyes. "Half and half. At least I don't have to pick the pepperoni off now, I can just eat the sausage."

"I don't understand how you can't like pepperoni."

"I like my sausage, my Canadian bacon and my cheese," Lindsay explained. "Notice that there was no 'and pepperoni' in there…_anywhere_."

"Marty!" Danny hailed, grateful not to have to come up with a response to the pepperoni challenge.

The younger man raised a hand in greeting. "Detectives. What brings you down to my humble dwelling?"

Danny caught whiff of something and wrinkled his nose. "Sure as hell ain't the smell. Damn, Marty, what _is_ that?"

Marty Pino pointed to the body on the table. "Found him in the sewers during routine maintenance. They just brought him in. Far as I'm concerned, they can have him back. Did you tell Taylor I was the one that rearranged the shelves in the refrigerator?"

"No," Danny shook his head. "Why?"

"Because much as I love the night life here at the wild and fun Crime Lab…this is my third week of night shifts. I've never gone more than a week. He's punishing me."

"He doesn't know." Lindsay replied. "He hasn't said anything to Danny and I, and believe me, he'd say something." She put a hand on his shoulder. "Face it, Marty. You're just lucky."

"So. Messer, Monroe. You two have anything exciting planned for tonight?"

The door to autopsy opened and a voice called, "What's going on down here?"

Lindsay jerked and felt Danny tense right next to her. They looked over.

Adam stood there, a huge grin on his face. "Had ya going, huh?" He came over. His three coworkers were glaring at him. "What?" Adam shrugged. "I'm bored."

"Welcome to the club," Marty replied. He checked his watch. "I'll be back." He disappeared into another room.

Lindsay looked at Danny questioningly. "Giants are playing," Marty yelled.

"We've got pizza, Marty," Lindsay said. The smell was getting to her. "We'll just take this upstairs so it…uh, doesn't get contaminated."

"By that smell," Danny stressed in her ear, and Lindsay burst out laughing.

"Marty? You're welcome to join us," Lindsay told him.

"In a minute!" Marty yelled. Then they heard him swear.

"Giants must be losing," Danny shrugged. "Let's go…away, from here. Now. Faster would be better." He made an overexaggerated show of running out the door. "'Cause if Marty doesn't take his aggression out on us and kill us, the smell will!"


	2. Chapter 2

"So then Lindsay here says, 'Make tracks, Cowboy.' I mean, come on. Do I look like the _City Slicker_ type?"

Lindsay smiled. "Personally, I think you'd look good in tight Wranglers and a button down handkerchief print shirt."

Danny cringed. "That hurts," he said. "I'm not going all _Urban Cowboy_ on you."

"Good!" Marty declared.

Adam wrinkled his nose. "That's a nasty visual. Thanks, Lindsay."

She grinned. "Not a problem."

Only she hadn't been kidding. "Have you guys ever played I Never?" she asked them.

Marty nearly spit out the soda he'd been drinking. "Are you serious?" He smiled. "I love that game!"

Danny nodded. "I did, once. During college, a couple of the fellas on the baseball team went out for drinks one night. We met these girls, we played a round-"

"-And he has no idea what happened next," Marty cracked, prompting Danny to chuck a balled-up napkin at him.

"Shut up, Marty." Then Danny looked at Lindsay. "What surprises me, Montana, is that _you've_ played."

"Hey, there's a lot about me you don't know," Lindsay defended herself. "I played it in college."

"What's I Never?" Adam asked.

Three pairs of eyes turned to him. "You're not serious." Danny said.

"Adam, you've never heard of I Never?" Lindsay asked.

Marty Pino burst out laughing.

"What?" Adam demanded. "So sue me!"

"Here's the rule," Lindsay said. "You say I Never…and then think of something. If you've done it, you drink. If you haven't, you don't drink." She smiled. "We can use soda." She handed Danny two dollars and fifty cents. "Here. I'm buying."

"Hey, thanks, Lindsay," Marty said, reaching for the money. Lindsay snatched it from his hand. "Aw, why not me?"

"'Cause I don't like you. I mean…I like you, but not _like_ like you. I…oh, forget it. Because that's all the cash I've got. Better?"

Marty grinned. "It was worth it just to see you turn red."

"Danny? Hit him for me."

Danny obliged. "Yowch!" Marty said, rubbing the back of his head.


	3. Chapter 3

"Okay…I never been to a professional football game," Lindsay said four hours later. She watched the three guys take a drink, Danny from a Coke, Marty from a Mountain Dew, and Adam from a bottled water ("Can't hold your caffeine, Adam?" Danny had teased). They had agreed to play until 1) Nobody could think of any more questions, or 2) their beverages ran out. Everyone was pretty much down to the bottom.

"I never went to prom," Marty said on his turn.

"Imagine that," Danny shot back. But Danny drank, prompting Lindsay to call him on it.

"Oooh, you went to prom, Messer? With who?"

"'s it matter? You don't know her." Lindsay noted his face was turning red.

"Why is that embarrassing, Danny?" Lindsay pressed. "Who'd you go with?"

There was a pause. "Come on, Danny. What happens during the game stays here," she said.

He muttered something under his breath. Something unintelligible. "Danny…" Lindsay scolded.

"Spill it, Messer!" Marty spoke up.

"All right!" Danny exploded. "She was my cousin."

Marty and Adam burst out laughing. "Hey!" Danny defended himself. "She'd never gone, she was a senior, I was a junior. She was only in town for a couple of weeks. I didn't want to leave Nicole alone that night, so I asked if she wanted to go."

He looked at Marty. "If I wanted to, I would have had no problem getting' someone else to go. It's just that I didn't make up my mind if I wanted to go until the last minute, and then all the girls in my class were taken."

"Danny, it's just a game!" Lindsay spoke up. "You're taking it too seriously. Relax. I'm sure you were quite the ladies man in high school, nobody's debating that."

"I am," Marty said, grinning. Lindsay threw him a Look.

"My turn," Adam said, trying to diffuse the situation. "I never called in sick because the Giants were playing." He specifically turned to Marty.

Danny and Lindsay both turned to Marty. Marty took a swig from his soda. "They were playing for a wild card slot," he explained.

"I don't think I'd ever be that brave," Lindsay said. "Sometimes I think Mac has ESP."

"He gives you that Look," Danny clarified. "Like he's looking directly into your head and like, accessing your memories of the night before to see if you've got a hangover or something."

"Which is a really freaky visual," Adam said. "Let's move on, please."

"I never been on a blind date," Danny said.

Adam took a drink, Marty took a drink, and then, to Danny's utmost surprise, _Lindsay_ downed some of her Sprite. "Oooh, Montana." Danny teased.

"I was a sophomore in college," Lindsay said, not even shy about it. "His name was Eric. My roommate set me up with him. He was her ex. She thought we'd be perfect together. Secretly, I think it was just 'cause she hated me, and if the date went bad, I'd blame her, get mad and move out."

"And?" Adam prompted.

She shrugged. "We ended up dating for six months. My roommate moved out." Before Danny could ask for other details, she said, "I never got a tattoo." She added, "And if you got one, you gotta prove it."

Adam downed the last of his bottled water and lifted up his sleeve to reveal a heart with his girlfriend of three year's name inside it on his upper arm.

Marty showed them the Giants football helmet ("Why am I not surprised?" Lindsay said) that was on his shoulder blade before taking the final sip of his Dew.

"Danny?" Lindsay prompted.

Danny revealed the tattoo on his right upper arm. "Got it done when I was eighteen," he explained. "On a dare from a friend of mine. Didn't like the needle so much, but the artwork ain't so bad."

Nobody caught the next move but Danny. _Lindsay _subtly took the last drink of her Sprite. "Ho!" Danny shouted triumphantly, scaring the living daylights out of Adam. "Montana? Tell me it ain't so!"

She turned beet red, embarrassed at being caught. "I was hoping nobody'd see that," she said.

Danny grinned. "Show and tell time."

"Please don't make me," Lindsay begged. "Come on."

Adam's eyes widened. "Hey, you were the one who said you had to prove it," he pointed out.

Marty was laughing. "This is _priceless_!" he gasped. "I never, _ever_ woulda pegged you for the tattoo type, Monroe!"

Lindsay was turning red. "Come on," Danny mimicked her early statement, "what happens in the game stays in the game."

Lindsay sighed. Then she stood up and untucked her shirt.

Danny's eyes were as round as dessert plates, and he felt his face getting hot.

Lindsay turned around and pulled the shirt up just enough to reveal a very small pink turtle at the small of her back. "My best friend back home has a matching one," she said.

There was a pause. "That's it?" Danny finally said.

She looked at him. "What do you mean, 'that's it'?" she asked. She sat down again.

"You were trying to hide that? Geez, I thought it was…"

"A little lower?" Lindsay asked with a knowing look. "Yeah, I figured. It was worth it just to see you turn red." She smiled.

He opened his mouth to say something, and then just shook his head.

"I wonder if Taylor's got any tattoos," Marty mused.

"He doesn't seem the type," Danny said, and Lindsay agreed.

"I don't seem the type for what?"

Danny felt his heart stop.

Lindsay, Adam and Marty all froze.

Mac Taylor was leaned against the door frame to the conference room.

"The type to…fire your employees because they weren't actually working on a slow night. We're all caught up, by the way," Danny thought fast. "We're just swapping work stories."

There was a very long, very awkward silence.

"I'll see you all here next week for five-on night shifts," Mac said finally. He looked each one of them in the eye.

"I'll be downstairs with Swamp Thing," Marty said, taking his exit.

"Oh, my sample from DNA is done!" Adam practically flew from the room.

That left Danny and Lindsay. "Just trying to maintain positive employee relations," Danny tried.

"I see. Enjoy your night shifts next week," Mac said pointedly.

Danny bit his lip. "Got it." He looked at Lindsay. "Let's go over that evidence one last time, just to make sure we've triple-checked it."

"Okay." Lindsay followed him slowly from the room. Across the hall in the confines of the DNA lab, Danny turned to Lindsay. "Geez, Montana."

"Hey, you played, too!" she replied. "How was I supposed to know he was gonna come in early?"

"I never got a tattoo? What were you thinking?"

"What about the I Never been on a blind date?" Lindsay shot back. "Good thing we weren't still on that one!"

"Well, what about…"

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Mac Taylor watched them return to work. He couldn't actually hear what was being said, but he knew that there was a lot of finger pointing happening.

He sat down in his office. He'd come in early to work on some paperwork. As he began flipping through the first file, he couldn't help but smile. They were too good at their jobs to be fired, and it was a slow night. Maybe, just maybe, a few more night shifts would help them learn.

_I wonder if Taylor's got any tattoos_.

_He doesn't seem the type_.

Mac thought of the eagle, globe and anchor on his shoulder blade and smiled.

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**The End!**

**Shameless plug: Hey, if you liked this one, check out the two before it: Night Shift Mischief and NSM: Twenty Questions. "I Never" comes courtesy of a review from prplerayne.**

**Got any ideas for a CLEAN game to make a night go faster? Drop me a review!**


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